“What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?”

I answered that already, back in elementary.

THE MODERN HIDALGO: Entry_009
Written: Friday. July 12, 2019.

There was a time, back in elementary, when I was asked by my teacher: “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

She was a Filipino Teacher, meaning she taught the Filipino subject. Though she was also a Filipino Citizen. Just to make things clear.

I can’t recall why I said what I said. I was maybe 11 years old. I’m not sure. I was still a young kid back then. I played a lot of Game-Boy Advance back then.

Watched a lot of Ben 10, and day-dreamed of one day finding the Omnitrix, and using it for good. That day never came, though I still very much liked the Ben 10 series, just not its most recent iteration.

My face was just starting to grow pimples. Yeah, that’s about right.

I was very insecure with how I looked. I never really liked how I generally looked like. Even now, I’m still a bit insecure about how I look. Though the pimple-phase is now gone, at least.

I wasn't that light-skinned. Wasn't that tall.

I was the skinny kid bullies could play around all week. It’s as society makes it to be. I’m an easy target, because of my scrawny look. And because I didn't know how to fight, they would pick on me, take my lunch, and eat it in front of me. Sometimes, just leaving me with 40% of what was once my 12 o’clock meal.

I didn't like that phase of my life. Heck, who does? But whenever I look back on it, I get this smile on my face. It’s weird, but I've grown to look back at those moments with pure delight.

I remember the jokes, the bruises, the pranks my classmates made. I never try to question why they did it. It would be like questioning why you breath air.

It’s in their nature to bully, the mouth-breathers. Ill-minded individuals, they were. They needed an outlet, because maybe behind closed doors, they would get the same beating they did to me, but from their mothers or fathers.

It’s a psychological effect that happens to young kids. Who am I to be able to control what happens in their homes?

My answer to the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” was this:

“I want to be a teacher.”

It’s not really the ultimate answer that I expected to come up with at the time. But people were waiting on me to answer the question, so that was the best one that came out of me.

Why did I say that I wanted to be a teacher? I was never the type of kid who would aspire to go back to school if I ever finished it. Nor was I someone who wanted to spend my whole life trying to scold naughty students from making so much noise or pulling each others hair.

But I think the reason why I said I wanted to be a teacher, and why I still want to be able to fulfill that answer, is the same reason that I gave to my Filipino Teacher that day:

“I want to become a teacher so that I could teach.”

Seems like a dumb answer, reading it out loud while I’m writing it down. But it’s seems like the perfect answer to give, at the time, and even now.

I don’t really wanna be a teacher anymore. No. That’s out of the question. I’m never gonna fall for the stupid system they've created for teachers in every institution or university out there.

But I want to be able to teach.

I want my work to someday be able to enhance the knowledge of the youth. Especially now, with how the new generations are looking…it’s not looking good, believe me.

There’s this yearning that I have, inside me, of wanting to mold kids into being useful to society when they grow up. I want them to be more active when it comes to helping the planet be cleaner. I want them to become leaders of the country. Bright, and truthful leaders, who don’t lie to the masses in front of their faces.

I want them to be able to make cities, new inventions, keep the Filipino Culture alive by practicing it in their daily lives.

I want the youth to be able to speak smart paragraphs. Be able to use complicated words on a sentence. To argue in a civilized way. To accept mistakes when they make it. To treat each other respectfully.

I want the Youth to be Smart. And the way for me to do that, the same way anyone could, is by teaching.

I think the reason why I had to experience being bullied by my classmates is because that’s the effect of an un-educated person. Not just by the books, but by manners.

I think the reason why most of us right now are no longer known to be humble, or kind, or loving, is because we don’t see it around us anymore, that’s why we don’t try to emulate it, to imitate it the best we can.

It’s in human nature to imitate what they see around them.

Therefore, they will always scream if you scream at them.
They will always curse if you curse at them.
They will hurt others if you hurt them.
They will make others feel pain if they feel pain.
They will cry because you make them cry.

But,

They can also share their food to others, if you tell them its okay to do so.
They will ace tests, if you study with them a week or night before.
They will help others because you taught them how to.
They will defend the defenseless, if that is what you teach them.
They will smile, and others will smile with them, because you try to make them smile every day, with your jokes, your goofy antics, and your playful parenting.

The journey of a thousand miles starts with one step. And that first step starts with you.

I don’t want to be a Teacher, but someone who teaches.

Word of the day: Inception.

  • the beginning of something; start.

22 | Dope as Fuck.